As we navigate our way through a constant stream of medical appointments and the task of remembering to take meds/injections we are buoyed by the generosity of our peeps. All manner of gifts keep coming our way, from handmade, soft toques and shawls, gorgeous floral bouquets, awesome meals (as invited guests and prepared meals which keep our freezer filled) to the completely unexpected, stunning quilt below ...
The quilt made and gifted by Margaret Froese, February 9th |
Almost three months out of surgery the desire to paint struck. The painting calling me was the dragon I'd started last March outside of Victoria's Mountain Equipment Co-op. In the 2.5 hours I spent standing on the cold pavement all I accomplished was a complex drawing of only the dragon using a brush and burnt umber oil.
I took my supplies to the Art Room at Linderman Law and settled in for a short, Saturday afternoon at the easel. That same evening we attended a most enjoyable and very stimulating dinner party. The following day I returned to the studio where I painted for too long. Come Monday I was completely spent. I required a two hour nap in the morning and another hour long one in the afternoon. Clearly, right now, my ambition is not aligned with my physical capacity. This is very humbling.
I took my supplies to the Art Room at Linderman Law and settled in for a short, Saturday afternoon at the easel. That same evening we attended a most enjoyable and very stimulating dinner party. The following day I returned to the studio where I painted for too long. Come Monday I was completely spent. I required a two hour nap in the morning and another hour long one in the afternoon. Clearly, right now, my ambition is not aligned with my physical capacity. This is very humbling.
February 11th in the Art Room at Linderman Law |
We've brought my paints home where I may or may not paint. I'm concerned I won't have the common sense to paint for only short periods of time, but mostly the urge has left.
Following the 420 Clinic's recipe, I added the 15 grams of dried marijuana to three cups of heated sunflower oil and cooked it, on low in our slow cooker, for one hour. The house smelled as if there was a wild party in progress. When the oil had cooled I strained it through cheesecloth and filled these sealer jars ...
Those with white contents have been frozen. The oil keeps in the refrigerator for sixty days |
The 420 Clinic advised that I orally take, 1ml three times a day. After a week, without pain relief, I called my trusted provider. The fellow I spoke with asked about my preparation and was surprised at how much oil I'd used. The ratio of their prepared oils is 10 parts oil to 1 part marijuana. Problem is their oils are heavy in THC (psychoactive) with only a trace of CBC (the anti-inflammatory component). I was advised to slowly increase the dosage of the batch I'd made. At the time of this post I am swallowing a lot of sunflower oil daily, 5ml three times a day and still I have no pain relief. Through the 420 clinic I'm making application to a different provider that has prepared oils with a higher percentage of CBD. I may add some THC to the mix. We can discuss this with the prescribing doctor at my March 7th appointment.
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Mid month my entire perineum caught fire. I couldn't discern whether I had a bladder or a vaginal yeast infection. I wound up at our local ER the evening of the 16th. My urine sample was analyzed on the spot but the vaginal swab had to be sent away. I definitely had a bladder infection and was prescribed Fosfomycin, a packet of crystals added to water, intended to be a one shot fix. Still in pain the following evening, and convinced I had a vaginal infection as well, I went back to the ER where I was given 150 mg of Fluconazole for a yeast infection. It was an uncomfortable, long weekend. Tuesday, I made a third trip to the ER. The vaginal swab was back. No yeast infection. Another urine sample established the bladder infection was still raging. This time I was prescribed a seven day round of antibiotics which have cleared it up.
A chemo side effect is dry skin, and then these disgusting lesions erupted on my legs. They start as small, red, itchy spots with a hard lump beneath them. Then, the lump and itch disappear and they get bigger. I'm treating them with hydrocortisone cream and I'm seeing some improvement.
February 23rd marked the halfway point in my chemo treatments. As of March 2nd I have ten down and eight more to go. I continue to have no nausea and food tastes as it should so I eat - lots. On February 27th, at my follow-up appointment at genealogy/oncology, I learned that I've gained a pound. Also my blood work is holding its own and thanks to the Neupogen injections my white blood cell count is high. Home Care nurses have administered sixteen of the forty of these prescribed injections (I still daily inject the Tinzaparin blood thinner myself). Unfortunately, a side effect of Neupogen is that it promotes bone, muscle and joint pain. Exactly what I don't need. My left hip pains so much that I can't walk much at all. Outdoors, I use a cane and in the house as well when gripping the furniture and the walls isn't enough support.
On February 28th, at the Lethbridge Bone and Joint Clinic, a wonderful retired orthopaedic surgeon assessed me. Upon viewing my recent x-ray he told me what I already know, that I'm down to no cartilage in my left hip. I'm a candidate for a replacement, but first we must finish chemo, and then, I wish to have the colostomy reversed which means another surgery. With pain relief, of some sort, hopefully I can hold off having the hip replacement until January 2018. The hip pain is sometimes so wretched there are nights I cry myself to sleep. It's so much easier to be cheery and upbeat when I have respite from the pain.
Bill is helping in every way he can. I could never do this without him. It's taking as big a toll on him as it is on me. Please keep those prayers and good vibes coming and we promise to keep our spirits elevated. Heartfelt thanks to all of you.
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A chemo side effect is dry skin, and then these disgusting lesions erupted on my legs. They start as small, red, itchy spots with a hard lump beneath them. Then, the lump and itch disappear and they get bigger. I'm treating them with hydrocortisone cream and I'm seeing some improvement.
Still sporting some leg hair |
All vanity aside here. March 3rd, I still have some hair, (and it appears to be growing) eyebrows and eyelashes |
February 23rd marked the halfway point in my chemo treatments. As of March 2nd I have ten down and eight more to go. I continue to have no nausea and food tastes as it should so I eat - lots. On February 27th, at my follow-up appointment at genealogy/oncology, I learned that I've gained a pound. Also my blood work is holding its own and thanks to the Neupogen injections my white blood cell count is high. Home Care nurses have administered sixteen of the forty of these prescribed injections (I still daily inject the Tinzaparin blood thinner myself). Unfortunately, a side effect of Neupogen is that it promotes bone, muscle and joint pain. Exactly what I don't need. My left hip pains so much that I can't walk much at all. Outdoors, I use a cane and in the house as well when gripping the furniture and the walls isn't enough support.
On February 28th, at the Lethbridge Bone and Joint Clinic, a wonderful retired orthopaedic surgeon assessed me. Upon viewing my recent x-ray he told me what I already know, that I'm down to no cartilage in my left hip. I'm a candidate for a replacement, but first we must finish chemo, and then, I wish to have the colostomy reversed which means another surgery. With pain relief, of some sort, hopefully I can hold off having the hip replacement until January 2018. The hip pain is sometimes so wretched there are nights I cry myself to sleep. It's so much easier to be cheery and upbeat when I have respite from the pain.
Bill is helping in every way he can. I could never do this without him. It's taking as big a toll on him as it is on me. Please keep those prayers and good vibes coming and we promise to keep our spirits elevated. Heartfelt thanks to all of you.
Dear Alice, stay brave and strong! I'm sending you healing thoughts of love and good health, along with an extra large hug. Keeping you in my thoughts!
ReplyDeleteMany thanks Laura xox
DeleteOh my dear Alice what can I say. It's so unfair isn't it to have to go through so much. You're being very brave - I daresay everyone says that - but keep your chin up (another cliche.) I'm so glad you were able to paint again - it shows your spirit is alive and kicking, even if the body protested. Keep it up whenever you can, but you don't need me to tell you that. Love and hugs to you, Bill and all your family xxx
ReplyDeleteMany thanks for your precious words Jacky. I know "the call" to paint will come again and that I'll be wise and answer, with common sense!
DeleteDearest Alice, the only thing i can think of is love, so I am mustering all the love that's in me...... Your courage and perseverance and beautiful spirit are seen by all. More love headed your way........zoee
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DeleteMany, many thanks, Zoee. Love is the best gift of all, we receive yours with our hearts wide open. xoxo
Deleteand for Bill, A wonderful and gentle soul, take time out just for you! You are in a very tough position in life. Much much love....... tossing more in the universe to come your way.
ReplyDeleteYes, thanks for the love you send Bill as well.
DeleteHis is not a easy job right now, but he does it with the utmost devotion I'm a very fortunate gal.
Such an intense post, Alice, with the challenges and difficulties that you (and Bill) are facing, and the grace with which you hold the line. Energy, prayers and loving thoughts to you both...xoxox
ReplyDeleteWhat beautiful words of love and encouragement. Thank you Win.
DeleteEvery night.... you are in my prayers. I always knew that you and Bill were strong and through my tears, I send big hugs to you both. As I always have.
ReplyDeleteThank you Richard, this is without a doubt one of our hardest journeys. Your words and prayers are much appreciated.
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